One day, I woke up feeling like I was drowning in my own thoughts. I wasn’t in the mood to start the day; everything seemed so heavy. It felt as though I had lost my way, and I didn’t even know why. I was struggling to find clarity.
Hey everyone, my name is Salena, and this is my story.
That morning had started like any other; everything seemed perfectly normal. But then, out of the blue, my boyfriend stormed in, yelling at me for no apparent reason. I was completely taken aback. I tried to calm him down, thinking perhaps he was just stressed from work. But he didn’t stop; his anger only grew. He started shouting at me, and soon his words turned into insults. I stood there, confused and hurt, trying to understand what I had done to deserve this.
As he continued, I realized I was sobbing, almost apologizing to him without knowing why. I loved him, after all, and thought that maybe if I could just comfort him, he would stop. But he didn’t. Instead, he pushed me away and started throwing out more hurtful words. It was like a slap in the face – a wake-up call for my conscience.
My mind was spinning. Was he doing this on purpose? Was he really under some immense pressure and taking it all out on me? My heart didn’t want to believe what was happening, but my reality was crumbling right before my eyes. After what felt like hours of arguing, he simply said, “I can’t do this anymore. I’m breaking up with you,” and walked out.
I felt my whole world shatter. I tried to call him, desperate to understand what had just happened, but he had blocked me on everything. In an instant, he was gone. I was left alone, feeling completely abandoned, confused, and devastated. That night was the hardest. I barely managed to get through the day, and when it was time for bed, I couldn’t sleep. My mind was racing with a thousand thoughts, so I took a few sleeping pills just to find some peace. I was terrified, lost, and broken, unsure of what to do next.
The next morning, I woke up feeling even worse. My mood was all over the place, and tears just kept falling uncontrollably. I couldn’t shake the feeling that I didn’t want to continue anymore. How could someone I loved so deeply just leave me like that? How could he abuse me, hurt me, and then vanish without a trace? I felt like my whole world had crumbled, and I had no motivation to keep going.
Days passed, and there was no contact from him. I was stuck in this endless loop of pain, trying to move on but feeling trapped in my own misery. I felt like I had lost myself. Each day felt heavier, darker, and I was sinking deeper into a pit of despair.
But then, something incredible happened. My friends found out what I was going through. And that’s when everything began to change.
They became my lifeline. I didn’t even realize how much I needed them until they showed up for me. For the next several days, they never left me alone. Sam would come by every morning to pick me up for work, making sure I got out of bed and faced the day. Myra would always bring me homemade meals or little treats, knowing that I wasn’t taking care of myself. And Shanya would call me every night, just to check in, to make sure I wasn’t alone with my thoughts.
Slowly, the past started to fade. The pain didn’t vanish overnight, but the intensity of it lessened bit by bit. My present became more important than the hurt of my past. My friends had become my support system, a foundation I could lean on when I felt too weak to stand on my own.
Day by day, I felt myself getting stronger. I made a conscious decision to give my 100% to moving forward, to live in the present and focus on building a better future. It wasn’t easy – in fact, it was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done. But with every passing day, I found myself smiling a little more, feeling a little lighter, and beginning to enjoy life again.
I realized that I could find happiness, even after such a painful experience. I made new memories, I laughed more, I cried less, and I chose to live each moment to the fullest. I surrounded myself with the people who truly cared about me, my friends, my family, and my loved ones.
Looking back, I realized something important about my past relationship. I had been so consumed by it that I had let go of everything else that mattered. I isolated myself from my friends, and my world shrunk to just the two of us. He would say things like, “You don’t need anyone else when you have me,” and I believed it. I thought we were each other’s entire world, but I was wrong.
A healthy relationship doesn’t mean cutting off other parts of your life. You need your friends, your family, your work – every part of your life is important and deserves attention. I had given up so much to please one person, thinking that’s what love was supposed to be. But real love doesn’t ask you to shrink yourself, it doesn’t isolate you from the world. It grows with you, it lifts you, and it respects all the parts that make you who you are.
Today, I live for every moment. I’ve learned to cherish every second, to stay happy, and to never let anyone make me feel small again. I keep my friends and family close because they are the ones who will always be there, no matter what. I no longer act sad or defeated; instead, I cheer for myself, my friends, and everyone I love.
“Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment.”
– Buddha
So, here’s what I’ve learned from my journey: If you find yourself in a relationship where your partner keeps you away from others, makes you feel like they are all you need, and you begin to lose touch with everything else that’s important, then it’s time to take a step back and reassess. That kind of relationship is toxic. Love should never isolate you; it should be inclusive, nurturing, and supportive.
To everyone out there, never let a relationship make you feel alone. Never hide your relationships from your friends and family. Be open, be true to yourself, and remember, real love will never make you feel less than you are. Surround yourself with people who lift you up, and be that person for others too.
Thank you to everyone who supported me, and a special thanks to Womenself for publishing my story. Remember, always be yourself, because you are enough, just as you are. #BeYourselfMore
With love,
Salena.
Salena.
